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Jan
16,
2008 |
Smoke
Me A Kipper |
Artist:
Ensor, James Sitting at a table in a crowded restaurant, James Ensor was reflecting on his dismal life as a cuticle insurance salesman and prodding at his main course with the invention he envied most: the spork. At precisely the same moment as the sudden passing of an elderly couple sitting across from him (who had both taken a double dose of the 'Cyanide punch'), Ensor felt a subtle movement within his loinal regions. Although this was later attributed to the medical condition known as "septic testicle", Ensor believed it to be artistic inspiration, political insight, and the result of having rushed his appetizer: Green eggs and ham. Jabbing his neighbor diner-goer (an 8 year old boy) in the eye with the aforementioned spork, Ensor proceeded to steal the young lads crayons and began a frantic sketching on the reverse of his own paper diner plate, creating the work of art we present to you above. Much scholarship has been poured into Ensor's singular act of dramatic creation, and it has since been agreed upon that the whole piece is a reference to the founding fathers of America, and the tensions leading up to their scuffle with the British. The herring is symbolic of the good life, that which the British had through the rich heritage of their long-standing monarchy, and which the Americans were attempting to take for themselves through the cultural advance of a bureaucratic government. The strong desire of the Americans to make this good life their own is shown through the evident tension in the painting, while the use of skulls shows their willingness to go to the grave to obtain it. There is also a subtle reference found in the use of the extended mandible, showing America's 'slack jawed' approach to getting what they wanted. Ensor work is nothing if not self-contradictory, but it is made all the greater by that. And the big hat of the British character represents... a big fucking hat. That is to say, "Come on! Those 10ft tall hats were fucking awesome. Obviously one wouldn't wear such a hat in the maternity wing where one's wife was in the process of delivering one's firstborn son, but hell, if one is going off to war than it is best if one can assume the appearance as some massive mutant creature or other such horrible thing.' Unfortunately, Ensor's use of coded symbolic imagery led only to confusion and anger, and the crowd at the restaurant proceeded to burn down the local mall and executed an entire bags worth of jelly babies (by hanging) in the town center. And although the piece was later considered to be an artistic masterpiece, Ensor refused to ever come out of hiding to receive his "Seriously, We're Not Going To Hurt You, Just Tell Us Where You Are' Award. The awards committee eventually gave up waiting for him and decided to do something more interesting, such as badger batting and other gentlemanly pursuits...
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one of the redlands
